Photo Credit: Kindred Hues

Being an orphan is when both parents are deceased. So, without parents, who does a child of any age have to lead them or look up to? God-parents? What if they don’t have them either? Aunts, Uncles? Possibly. I can’t imagine as a child what it’s like to not have your parents to love on you, teach and guide you. Whether they be deceased or just absent. However, I do know what it’s like as an adult to not have either parent present in my life. As an adult, it hurts, it feels lonely, and sometimes you question who you are.

What raised the question was a phone conversation I recently had with my uncle. We talked about my Mom being taken too soon. Which then led to him asking about my dad. “Is he alive?” he asked. “No, he’s deceased as well.” I said. I lost him when I was 15. Silence filled the airways. My uncle then asked, “well who do you have to look up to.” My eyes welled up. Good question! I thought to myself, God. But physically here on earth, I would have to say no one when it comes to parents. The closest I have as parents would be them, my aunt and uncle. After that phone call, I sat in silence. Fighting back tears. A rush of memories flooded my mind. I thought about my Mom, thought about my Dad and immediately I felt the brokenness the emptiness. I mean honestly, who do I have? Who’s pouring into me like only a mother and father could?

Photo Credit: Tess

I know one thing is for sure, I have God! God has blessed me with amazing aunt and uncles, an awesome Mother N Love, and beautiful women that I consider mothers. Yes, I have each of them and I am truly thankful & blessed, but no one will ever take the place of my birth mother or father. Giving me what only a mother and father can. The void of not having a mother or father will always reside within me. I can make the choice to stay in that place of questioning and allowing that pity to define me or I can make the choice to believe that even without my parents, I still have a purpose.

Photo Credit: Diana Simumpan

I say all that to say two things!

First off, If your parents are alive, cherish them! If you’re not speaking, ask God to show you how to mend the relationship and call them. If you haven’t forgiven them for something they’ve done, forgive them. Remember, they’re human, they make mistakes too.

Exodus 20:12

"Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the LORD your God is giving you.”

Secondly, if your parents are deceased, ask God to fill the void. Seek Him. He’s the only one that can bring you the kind of joy, happiness, peace, and understanding, that you need as an Orphan. And always remember, you’re not alone. There’s someone out here just like you and you have people in your life that God has sent to support and love you. Now, close your eyes, exhale, allow the memories of your parents to fill your heart. They live within you in that special place deep down inside your heart, they will forever be with you.

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Author Amara L. Russell

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